That dream was freaky & so realistic that my heart start pounding when I woke up! What dream you ask? Its about her! It was an awful dream! I still can remember it! I hold a grudge on this certain person in that dream! Of course not her! But yeah whatever! Its only a dream! I fucking miss her that morning! So much!
Another question that have been floating inside my head! Fuck am i emo? or is this just the feeling of love? I have no idea! I miss her every second, i think of her, i even think of her in my uncontrolled dream! But what I did realise is when ever she is not around Im moody! Or is this what you call puberty? If it is, growing up must sucks!
So lets carry on! Today was a really bad day!
1. Of that dream i had.
2. I know that she will leave today.
3. I suck at Poa & eventually have to do it!
4. Im stressed out by these long exams.
5. Frequent headache!
6. Moody since exam started!
Yes quite a hand full for a mere mortal such as my self to handal!
I know im sensitive! Most people are! Writing stuff like this! It makes my morale weak!
Poa as i thought is difficult! Stressed out! So yeah after that hanged out with her for a moment! A brief moment! Then staring at my phone to see if my dad came yet with the gifts i wanted to give to her! Quickly went to the front miss calling my dad! As i was not stressed already! Clock was ticking so fast & my dad arrived! I dont know what time she usually goes home! So I ran to the canteen! But no where of her! I ran outside the school! No luck!
Msged her! But she left already! I was shattered! Like really upset! Walking back to my car as seem i cant walk, with an injured pride! Slowly came in the car! I was not mad at him as i was just to shaken! My mouth wont open my nerves are shaking my eyes were teary! A big hollow in my heart! Wanted to said those words i've been dying to say! & just giving her gift! But yeah whatever is only a gift I suppose! A bitter farewell i must say...
I was shallow all the way to the hospital where my dad want to meet his old friend! Walked there quietly! I felt angry & upset as i got to thinking of that incident! Wanting to injure my self! Punching the car & elevator! Tears fell! Good thing it was a hospital! Met my dad's old classmate! It shaken me on how fragile he was lying on his bed so weak & in pain! My dad was in silence too! I realise how short our life are! My dad placed his hands with his! They are like form3 buddies who worked together in immigration! As my dad told me of his stories!
We both walked in silence! Soon got to the car that gift was just there in the car! I saw the sight of that gift an unhappy one... It just does not complete my day! A deeper feeling in my emotion! It feels like my life just got paused or was hanging! Fuck! I so miss her much! I love her!
Well have fun on your hols~
I'll Miss You Much~
I Love You So~
<3
I'll Miss You Much~
I Love You So~
<3
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